Sunday, November 30, 2008

A Day In The Life Of A Football Addict



As quite a few of you are aware I am obsessed with Sundays. Not just with the day but with my particular routine during football season. This being Thanksgiving weekend (and since there aren’t as many games on today as normal, which should make it easier to multi-task) I thought I’d share a little bit of my day with you all.


6 am - Meet The Press is on. Today Brokaw is interviewing First Lady Laura Bush and the Ambassador to Afghanistan Said Jawad. It’s a lot of gibber gabber on the state of women’s relations in that region. I’d much rather hear them talk about the foibles of her husband. Maybe even ask her some questions about the book she’s going to be releasing in a few months. When the MTP guests are half way decent I’ll stick this out until 7 but this is sort of lame so its time to switch to…



6:30 am - The Sports Reporters. It’s a decent program on ESPN where a panel of sports journalists get together and discuss some of the current sports issues. I can’t wait for them to get to the Plaxico Burress story. This time of year they are usually stuck arguing over the current BCS system and whether or not there should be a playoff (there should be) in Division 1 college football. As expected their perspective on the Burress situation is spot on.
As a happy foot note, it turns out that Charlie Weiss has a worse winning percentage at Notre Dame than Tye Willingham did. Happy, happy, joy, joy.


7 am - Time to switch over to NFL Gameday Morning. LOL, they just referred to Burress as the “Barney Fife of Hip Hop”. They also say that NY has some of the toughest gun laws in the country which could mean up to 5 years in jail for Capt. Mus-Tard. What an idiot! All that money and you just can’t figure it out. If you need a gun to go to a night club it just might be that the night club isn’t the place to be.
Even Warren Sapp thinks Burress is a moron. This kid is officially out on an island.



7:20 am - There’s a tornado watch in Tampa. This could really affect the guys playing in this game. I make a mental note to check some of the other rosters in the FFL league to see who this might affect. It also looks like it’s going to be snowing in Green Bay today. It’d be nice to see that game be a low scoring affair. I’m now considering starting the Packer’s Defense (if I get them in today’s waiver process).



7:30 am - More bad weather across the league. They’ve got sleet in Foxboro where the Patriots play. It looks as if it’s sunny in San Diego (big shock). Somehow Norv Turner still has a job. According to Warren Sapp, during his two years being coached by Turner they never once practiced the 2 minute offense. I’m shocked. Marshall Faulk is shocked. Somewhere in San Diego a man is throwing his remote at his TV.




8:10 am - Showered and dressed, I’m now toggling back and forth between the NFL Network and ESPN. All of the talking heads agree on the stupidity of Plexico Burress. Someone else brings up the irony of this event happening almost a year to the day of Sean Taylor being shot last year in his home during a robbery. As fate would have it Burress’ team is playing against Taylor’s.



8:15 am - Brandon Jacobs, RB for the NY Giants will officially play today. Somewhere in Minnesota Orb takes a sigh of relief.


8:25 am - The news update ticker says it’s snowing in Buffalo. This doesn’t bode well for me as I’m playing against the Buffalo starting RB (Marshaun Lynch) and snow means lots of running.



8:27 am - They’re showing highlights from Thanksgiving. This means I have to endure watching the Seahawks lose again. Fortunately it’s a short highlight clip.



8:30 am - They’re back to Lambough field to talk about the Packers and more specifically Aaron Rodgers. I’m not interested in that at all. What I am curious about is that it is still not snowing there.



8:37 am - There’s a wasp outside of my living room window. This has absolutely nothing to do with football but considering the fact that we’re a day away from December I find it odd.



9:00 am - Time to check the waiver transactions. Did I get who I wanted. What moves did the other guys make. Oh the drama.



9:17 am - Off to The Winchester (a.k.a. Sluggers in Kingsgate). Breakfast and 6 big screen HD TV’s (34 TV’s in all) await.



9:32 am - Welcome to The Winchester. On the way here I decided to break my “no line-up changes on Sunaday” rule. I’ll make the change to the Packer Defense shortly. Gas is at $1.91 which is as low as it’s been in about 2 years. The only thing that has changed, supply and demand has not, is the crappy economy.






10:00 am - Kickoff Time! Feelin’ kind ‘a Sunday!!!!



10:21 am - So far the Defense switch has paid off. The Packers have 1 turnover and the Panthers #2 WR appears to be injured.



10:27 am - Green Bay gives up their first TD and simultaneously Reggie Wayne let’s a TD pass slip through his fingers. Not a good omen.



10:53 am - Buffalo makes it to the 4 yard line but Lynch is unable to punch it in. Bullet dodged.



10:57 am - Carolina scores TD number 2. My defensive scoring is now regulated to turnovers and sacks.



11:01 am The Redskins score a TD on an end around. Liz goes nuts. Hopefully it’ll take her mind off of Portis’ injury.





11:07 am - Peyton Manning scores on a QB sneak. The call is subsequently reversed on an apparent fumble. Grrrr.



11:35 am - Susham misses a 42 yard field gola for the Redskins. Lize get’s closer to suicide watch.



11: 46 am - Tampa scores a TD to take the lead against the Saints.



11:56 am - Tampa scores another TD (Garcia to Bryant). Meanwhile, Lynch (Buffalo) runs for a 50 plus yarder. Ouch!



12:03 pm - Peyton Manning has played 3 quarters without scoring a touchdown. This is not good Mav!





12:04 pm - The Giants score another TD to go up by 13 points. Liz begins to pace. She also appears to be doing something with her hair and the bridge of her nose that looks completely uncomfortable.



12:06 pm - Clayton for the Baltimore Ravens makes a spectacular one handed catch to score a 70 yard touchdown. The entire bar takes notice.



12:15 pm - The Colts defense scores a touchdown. Peyton Manning is still putting up a donut. Seriously!?!?


12:36 pm - The Redskins fail to covert on 4th and 1. This unofficially ends the game. Liz won’t admit it out loud but her body language tells the story. In fact she makes her way to the restroom. Considering she hasn’t had any fluids I don’t think it’s to pee. I feel for her.







12:47 pm - Peyton Manning is done for the day. When I needed it the most his final line was 125 yards passing and zero touchdowns. As I like to say that’s as many TD’s as I had and I sat around drinking beer all day.



1:01 pm - in a flurry of events Green Bay scores a Field Goal to take a 3 point lead with minutes left and then gives up a touchdown in 2 plays to find themselves down by 4 points.



1:09 pm - Aaron Rogers, QB for Green Bay, throws an interception to end the game after watching his team give it away the lead. Carolina gets away with one.


1:11 pm - In a nice surprise George Bullo shows up for the first time in months.



1:56 pm - I’m dead smack in the middle of the hi’s and low’s of Sunday. I’m currently convinced that I’m going to lose my FFL match and miss the playoffs. Please pass the Prozac.






2:13 pm - Thomas Jones just scored his 2nd touchdown on the day. I’m am Jacks Apathy.



2:20 pm - Roddy White walks off the field unaided with a slight injury. A fool continues to hope. Meanwhile the Pittsburgh/Patriot game is getting interesting.



2:53 pm - At the half of the Jets/Bronco game Jay Cutler, the opposing QB in my FFL game has 230 yards and 1 touchdown. I am Jacks Complete Discouragement.



3:28 pm - Cassel, the QB for New England, just turned it over for the 2nd time in 90 seconds. Pittsburgh is starting to take control of this game. There is a strong contingent of Steeler fans here at the Winchester today and they are making their presence felt.



3:36 pm - Wes Welker, WR for New England, just got obliterated by a huge hit over the middle of the field. To his credit he got back up again but that had to hurt.



3:39 pm - 3 plays later, Cassel fumbles the ball. Where’s Tom Brady when you need him? Meanwhile, Atlanta manages to score a touchdown without the help of Roddy White.



3:44 pm - I’m down by roughly 24 points with two players remaining tomorrow night. I’ve been in much worse spots but if I were to give a prognostication I’d say its over.






3:53 pm - Cassel’s Tight End neglects to catch a pass that is subsequently intercepted. The Stealer fans continue to grate on my nerves.



3:57 pm - The San Diego Chargers are on the verge of losing another close game. Norv Turner has had two opportunities to see his team run the 2 minute drill. It’s becoming evident that Warren Sapp was right.



4:05 pm - Norv Turner is officially the worst coach in NFL history. At least for today.


4:38 pm - There will be no Brett Favre magic today. Denver has shut them down once again. Another stalled drive. Meanwhile the Steelers have demolished the Patriots.



4:54 pm - Time to head home. I'm officially losing by close to 35 points. Not insurmountable but I'd much rather be in the lead. I am convinced that I will lose this week and miss the playoffs for the first time in a dozen years.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Hung Jury

One of the cool things you get to do if you're a "Lame Duck" President is pardon people. You don't even have to say why, you just do it. One of the thing I enjoy is seeing the list. Especially when it doesn't make any sense. Here's today's pardon list. Why are there so many drug dealers on it?

_Leslie Owen Collier of Charleston, Mo. She was convicted for unauthorized use of a pesticide and violating the Bald and Golden Eagle Protection Act.

_Milton Kirk Cordes of Rapid City, S.D. Cordes was convicted of conspiracy to violate the Lacey Act, which prohibits importation into the country of wildlife taken in violation of conservation laws.

_Richard Micheal Culpepper of Mahomet, Ill., who was convicted of making false statements to the federal government.

_Brenda Jean Dolenz-Helmer of Fort Worth, Texas, for reporting or helping cover up a crime.

_Andrew Foster Harley of Falls Church, Va. Harley was convicted of wrongful use and distribution of marijuana and cocaine.

_Obie Gene Helton of Rossville, Ga., whose offense was unauthorized acquisition of food stamps.

_Carey C. Hice Sr. of Travelers Rest, S.C., who was convicted of income tax evasion.

_Geneva Yvonne Hogg of Jacksonville, Fla., convicted of bank embezzlement.

_William Hoyle McCright Jr. of Midland, Texas, who was sentenced for making false entries, books, reports or statements to a bank.

_Paul Julian McCurdy of Sulphur, Okla., who was sentenced for misapplication of bank funds.

_Robert Earl Mohon Jr. of Grant, Ala., who was convicted of conspiracy to distribute marijuana.

_Ronald Alan Mohrhoff of Los Angeles, who was convicted for unlawful use of a telephone in a narcotics felony.

_Daniel Figh Pue III of Conroe, Texas, convicted of illegal treatment, storage and disposal of a hazardous waste without a permit.

_Orion Lynn Vick of White Hall, Ark., who was convicted of aiding and abetting the theft of government property.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

When The Goin Gets Tough, The Tough Get Nekkid


That thing they call the Global Economy is having a difficult time right now. There are several nations that have issued their own versions of a "government bail out package".


Today on the drive home I listened to a story on NPR about the French car industry and how Renault is on the verge of laying off thousands of works and out sourcing to other countries like Romania where the labor is much more affordable. It's tough all over. And as the saying goes, "when the goin gets tough..."


At the White Cockatoo (you just can't make this stuff up) Resort in Australia, owner Tony Fox has his own ideas on how to keep business {cough} up. Has anyone seen my passport?



CANBERRA (Reuters) - An Australian holiday resort will hold a month-long, nude "anything goes" party to combat an expected economic downturn, media reports said on Thursday.



"Tough economic times call for stiff measures," Tony Fox, the owner of the White Cockatoo resort in Mossman, in tropical Queensland state, told the Courier-Mail newspaper.



"It will be a hedonism resort, where anything goes for a month. It doesn't take rocket science to work out what it means," Fox said, naming March as the risque party month.



The controversial "clothes optional" resort made headlines three years ago when police were called to end partner-swapping parties after a swathe of public complaints.



"You've got to wonder what sort of people go and why. Where is the moral code of behavior and how do you stop jealousies and fights?" Cairns Catholic Bishop James Foley said after Fox's announcement.



But local regional Mayor Val Schier said she was not opposed to the event as long as no laws were broken.



"People in tropical north Queensland are extraordinarily creative," Schier said. "It is tough economic times and as long as it is with consenting adults, then there is no problem."



Australia's tourism in industry is being hit hard by global economic turmoil with official figures showing a 7.6 percent decline in overseas visitors in September.



Industry leaders expect holiday bookings may drop by up to a third in early 2009 and are planning a new international advertising campaign to coincide with the movie "Australia" starring Oscar-winning actress Nicole Kidman.



Fox said his resort was almost fully booked for the month-long rainforest party.



Fully booked huh? Imagine that.

Happy, Sneezy, Doc, & Me

It's been a busy year, what with the Politics and the Football and hell everything else. As a result I'm a bit behind on posting this pic. This is a shot of me this Halloween. I got the idea from my buddies blog a few years ago and when I was unable to think up a solid idea for what to be I went with this. All in all I think it worked out well.


Tuesday, November 4, 2008

United We Stand!




“And in the unlikely story that is America there has never been anything false about hope”

Today, something happened in America. Today WE elected a president. The margin was not close. WE THE PEOPLE gathered and volunteered and donated in unprecedented numbers. WE THE PEOPLE have elected Barack Obama to be the 44th President of the United States of America. Congratulations sir!

It was a long and winding road to get there. At midnight on the east coast the electoral vote count sits at 338 to 156 giving Barack more electoral votes than G. W. Bush received in either of his presidential victories.

As all presidential candidates before him there have been promises. As all candidates before him there is tremendous hope. This is no different.

As a huge supporter of Mr. Obama’s I’d like to offer my congratulations. The work ahead is not easy. You’ve inspired us with your vision. You have spoken to our better selves. You have caged the cynic within. You have made us believe. Not just in you but in ourselves. Millions of us believe that yours is the correct path. You have made me believe that all things truly are possible.

That in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope.

Thank you!!!

But please remember…with all of the Promise…with all of the Optimism…with all of the Hope

WE ARE WATCHING!

Don’t fuck it up.



I'm Begging You...Please...VOTE!!!!!

I don't care who you vote for (ok I care a little) but I care more that you just simply vote. It is your responsibility. Please! Cue the Budweiser guys