One of my co-workers has a fantastic idea. The idea is good enough to actually make money and who knows one day we may all say "I heard about the guy that thought that up". The name of his imagined organization is "Fall Guy". Ideally there'd be a website for it. I've checked and as of 5/16/07 http://www.fallguy.com/ is still available.
The premise behind FG is simple. Say you're an athlete, actor/actress, or someone else famous and you've just been busted by some authority figure for what would generally amount to a minor transgression. Maybe you got caught with a weed pipe in your car. You weren't smoking it at the time but it was still there when the cops pulled you over. Or maybe you got bagged during a prostitution sting operation. It could be that you have a cousin that is really into illegal dog fights. Perhaps you were at the strip club last night with your boys and shit got out of control and now someone is in intensive care.
This is where FG comes in. Here at FG we vow to step in during those "uncomfortable" public moments that celebrities often find themselves in. For a fee an FG representative will take the hit for you. Don't worry our operatives are well compensated during their tenure. And their "resumes" are ideal for this type of employment (now ex cons can find solid legal work with minimum risk. Hell, he might even be able to get Federal funding for this idea).
Think about it...this is a concept that we men are all too familiar with. At one point we've all had a buddy that was steppin out on his lady. You suspected it, hell maybe you even knew about it, and then the phone rang. It was his girlfriend/wife asking if you guys were having a good time. You choked down the "what do you mean" and muttered a "yah we're having a blast but he's in the bathroom right now praying to the porcelain goddess". She says tell him I called and closes with a small invocation of affection and you hang up. You've done your duty as a man. You've provided the "air cover" to his "ground assault" as it were. You congratulate yourself on your quick thinking and vow to have a talk with your buddy the next time you see him. After all, you've earned details.
This is the basis of Fall Guy. When the proverbial shit hits the fan FG will step in and say to anyone willing to listen "my bad". Or "is that where I left that". Or the ever favorite "I appreciate you trying to cover for me but I can't allow you to take the rap for that shit". Frickin Genius I tell ya.
Here's a list of our potential clients:
- Eddy Murphy
- Hugh Grant
- Mike Vick
- 2005 - 2006 Minnesota Vikings
- Randy Moss
- Paris Hilton
- Brittany Spears
- Lindsey Lohan
- Tommy Lee
- Ron Artest
- William Jefferson Clinton
- Newt Gingrich
- Rush Limbaugh
- Saddam Hussein
The list could go on forever. I'm telling you there is some serious merit in this idea. And now for no other reason than the fact that it gives me great delight, here is Lee Majors and the theme song to "The Fall Guy". Remember how hot Heather Thomas was back then?
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